


Sleep

by undernightlight



Series: Gays in Space [3]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Culmets - Freeform, Cute, Fluff, M/M, Sleepy time, SpaceBoos, Thinking, paul can't sleep, paul had on active mind at night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-18
Updated: 2018-01-18
Packaged: 2019-03-06 14:39:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13413402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undernightlight/pseuds/undernightlight
Summary: Paul can't sleep, so lies awake and thinks.





	Sleep

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy this! Not the best written, but I like writing ones focused on a character's thought.

He just stared at the wall smiling, feeling relaxed and at peace. It was late, or early, he wasn't sure, but he didn't mind. The warm arms around his waist were what mattered. Paul never felt more safe when he was in the arms of his doctor, because he knew he would be protected.

He could hear the quiet hum of the ships engine, and the occasion shift against the mattress from his partner's movement; he'd been awake for a while, but he had no desire to move. He occasionally heard the sounds of running outside their door, people getting from A to B, working and functioning and doing what they were ordered in times of war. The breathing he could hear had become a constant in his life, and had become something he couldn't even think of sleeping without; it acted like a lullaby, helping him drift to the land of the dreaming. Not tonight though, but he didn't mind so much, as it allowed him to listen to all the things he missed when he was tucked away in engineering. He could hear his breathing too, normal paced, not rapid or frantic, like when stumbling out of the spore chamber, or when he thinks Hugh's in danger, but it's deep breaths filling with oxygen and the smell of their sheets and the smell of his partner. Paul could never describe how Hugh smelt, and even thinking about describing it made him chuckle, because it sounded so strange, but his dear doctor smelt to him of antiseptic and of warmth and of everything that he believed in the world. Because Hugh always believed in him, in his abilities, and that was the strongest thing that kept him going.

His hands were closed around those gripping tightly to his shirt like a lifeline, and Hugh kept his face buried in the crook of Paul's neck, bodies pushed against each other, fitting perfectly after years of practice in bed together. The hot breath on his neck sent shivers through his body regularly, and he revelled in it each time. The sheets were soft and cold against his feet as he laid there, fully aware of everything around him.

He thought, and realised he'd be happy to give up everything for Hugh. He'd known that for as long as he'd loved him, but sometimes he is reminded of that. He understood his spores, something he'd been working on for so long, so long sometimes without the feeling of progress, and he saw the universe in a way no one else did. No one else could see this specific beauty that he could see when he looked around, when he looked into space from his chamber, and he'd give it all up in a heartbeat for Hugh. If Hugh asked him, he'd do it. He'd drop everything at his feet, and he'd drop to his knees for Hugh, whatever the good doctor needed.

Paul shifted in bed, turning as carefully as he could, to face his love. Hugh fidgeted, adjusting, but settled again, hands now sitting comfortable in the small of Paul's back, while Paul wrapped one arm around his back and rested a palm on Hugh's chest. He could feel life under his finger tips, with every rise and fall of his partner's chest, steady and deep. The frown lines usually across his face seemed to fade when he slept, only the faint creases of laughter and worry still present. Paul was proud to say some could be attributed to him, those of happiness and love, but not so much of those of panic and pain. He brought a hand to Hugh's face, smoothing the pads of his digits across the lines, feeling the smooth skin and the rough stubble beneath his hands.

Hugh stirred, eyes flickering open to meet Paul's, and Paul just smiled.

"I didn't mean to wake you," his hand resting against his cheek, his eyes fond. He kept his voice low, as hushed as he could as he looked into Hugh's soft and sleepy eyes.

"It's fine. Is everything okay?" Hugh was worried about his love. He'd been acting differently recently, and despite Paul's constant reassurance, he wasn't always reassured.

"Yeah. Everything is perfect." He moved closer, impossibly closer, and kissed his dear doctor with all he had, with everything he could muster at three in the morning. It wasn't the cleanest, the most pretty, but it was everything he felt. It was all the passion he had, all the love in his heart, all of his creation and imagination and all his dreams and aspirations. All of him was embodied into that kiss, and it was beautiful and romantic, but bittersweet, and he knew Hugh could feel it, because they pulled apart, but only their lips. Their foreheads against each other and noses brushing, Hugh hand remained planted on the back of Paul's neck, his fingers running through the hair at the nape.

"You're not okay, what's wrong?" Hugh was always perceptive, and he loved him for it when he wasn't the one being micro-analysed.

"I forget how much I miss you sometimes." He dropped his gaze and began making small rotations of his thumb against his partner's cheek bone. "Sometimes I feel I don't see you enough because I bury myself in my work, but I want you to know, you just ask for me to drop it and I'll-"

"I'd never ask that of you. You work a lot, and yeah, it's hard at times. But you commit to everything you do, and that's how you are; I'd never ask you to change anything, for I fell in love with you as the work addict you are, for the caring and fragile man that you are, and you should never change for me."

Paul's vision became glossed over as his eyes became wet, and he smiled at Hugh, looking up at him finally, and kissing him again. He broke only briefly.

"I love you." He became more desperate with every second, clinging to his lips like he'd slip away. Hugh's hand moved into Paul's hair, fingers stretching out through strands of white and blonde, the other pulling at his partner's shirt, fisting the fabric keeping their skin from direct contact. But they pulled away, staying close, wrapped up in each other, physically and emotionally.

"Get some sleep, my dear doctor, you have an early shift."

"I will try, if you sleep with me."

"Nowhere else I'd rather be, than in this bed with you." He buried his head into Hugh's neck and chest, and they settled together. "I love you," he repeated, feeling close to breaking, but knowing they both needed sleep, and knowing that Hugh would bring this up before they go to bed next, making sure there is plenty of time for tears if need be.

"I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> I find it much easier to write things from Stamets' POV, as I relate to him more that I do Culber, but I love them both, so I might try a Hugh centric one soon. I do think that Paul is my favourite character in Discovery, but I think all main characters are really strong (I include Hugh in this), so love them all.
> 
> STILL NOT OVER EPISODE 10 GUYS I'M READY TO FIGHT AARON HARBERTS AND GRETCHEN J BERG! I LOVE THEM AND I HATE THEM!


End file.
